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| How Your Parents' Relationship Determines Your Own What role does your family history play in your current relationship? Sometimes, behavior patterns are obvious. However, our relationships can look very different from those of our parents, while still being influenced by them. Consider the following scenarios. If your parents divorced... You too are worried about divorce. If your parents had the "ideal" marriage... You have a relationship that looks ideal on the surface, but that has deeper problems hidden underneath. If your parents fought a lot... You and your partner argue a lot too. If your mother or father was overbearing or too authoritarian... You act the same way, or you've chosen a partner who does. If your mother or father didn't spend time at home... Your partner is a workaholic, lives far away, or avoids intimacy. To examine how this phenomenon works in your own life, first make a list of traits in your parents' marriage. For each trait, think about your own relationship and ask whether you're completing a pattern or fighting against it. Once you're aware of how the problems in your relationship are caused by your family, you can begin to examine the underlying beliefs you hold that got you into your current situation. Understanding this can help you choose to forge your own path. History doesn't have to be destiny. Elsewhere on the Web
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